So join us as we share our porn pasts and breathe heavily into the microphones, won’t you? Oh, you will. I can smell it. Mmmmm. Musky.

Now, everyone… let’s dance!

But much better than that brief yet comical paragraph is the actual show, people! We got the world-famous MC Meat Sweats of Posey’s Pride up in this bitch for an epically awesome hour of entertainment.

Forever Your Love,
Luke and Posey

P.S. Yes, we know her name was Topanga. Just another brick in the fail-wall.

And hey, if you didn’t notice, I posted 5 songs from this very show to the Bits page, so please, have your way with them.

Here are the lyrics, with corresponding links, in case you don’t know wtf is going on.

Romance 2.0

VERSE:
Girl, I can’t shut my googly eyes,
You’re so fine I can’t help but look.

And imagine your hand, grabbing my d*ck like a pen,
and writing all in your face book.

CHORUS:
Girl you know I dig you
Cause you’re so delicious
Wanna stumble upon you
While you’re doing the dishes

Gonna turn you around
and stick it in, ya-hoo
I’m makin a mess in
Your kitchen and your cooch

PHONE:
P:Hello?
L:Hey, you know that girl you poked last week?
P:Yeah?
L:I’m thinking of poking her later, got any suggestions?
P:I know one thing that gets her all a-twitter…
L:Oh yeah? What’s that?
P:Flick ‘er nipple.
L:Flick ‘er nipple?
P:Flick ‘er nipple.
L:Thanks dude. Ya know, you’re one of my, like, top 8 friends.

VERSE:
Girl, I must confess,
You might say “You too big”
But I assure you there’s no need to fret it.

You just relax your throat
You can trust me, because I wrote
The Book of Love and then I went and I read it.

“Posey is a genius, a got-dam genius” – Rolling Stone
“Reminds me of a severely constipated Dave Grohl” – Spin
“I would be laughing my ass off, if I could feel my testicles. Wait, what?” – Dave Grohl

If you’re not familiar, The Bob & Tom Show is a nationally syndicated morning comedy radio show. They sponsor a massive tour starring various “headliner” comedians all over the country.

Yeah, that’s right. While you were sitting there at home, waiting for a new L&P show for the last 2 months, totally NOT laughing… here we were gallivanting around, rubbing the elbows of semi-celebrities, laughing all the way, and not even at our own jokes. If we were you, we would be furious. But we’re not you, and we know that makes you sad. Man, you are so depressed, and so angry! Glad we’re not your government-appointed psychiatrist.

But back to the matter at hand, frownie. You know us mostly as hilarious, kick-ass, slacker dudes, but in reality we are skilled inventors. The video below of Bob & Tom sports director Chick McGee was captured using Posey’s patented “Flower-Cam”. The product should explain itself:

Check it out, Greg Hahn’s a huge fan! He totally asked for a group picture of us autographing his belly, but we had people to see and, honestly, he was starting to creep us out.

So… about the picture quality. Our Canon “Mach XXXVII” is in the shop, so we had to bring the ol’ Polaroid FunMate 320BW. Which, and if you’re familiar with the model you know this, prints pictures on tiny 2 cm x 3 cm stickers. Luke carefully placed them on his mustache for safe-keeping as the night went on, and when he got home, he used an overhead projector and carbon paper to burn them up on the page here. He’s sort of a technographical genious.
We snapped several more pictures, but we didn’t think you’d want to see them… Luke just had to have nachos, so the only 2 that survived were on the corners of his mouth. If you really want to see Nick Griffin with cheese all over his face, let us know. On second thought, don’t.

When the night was through, Luke & Posey left the Strand Theatre skipping and giggling like schoolchildren who have yet to learn the world is out to destroy them. It felt almost… human.

For seriously though, thanks so much to Chick McGee, Donnie Baker, Nick Griffin, Patti Vasquez, Ralph Harris, Greg Hahn, Bob & Tom, Kristi Lee, and the entire Friggemall operation. You guys rock.

Hey RadioMall and Soundsnap, we pershunate ya.

KAPLOW!

(.)(.)

SPLUSH!

*puppies and rainbows* *oh, and these guys* *oh, and murderers*

This is from Episode 22 - Like A Tornado.

From Episode 23: Number One Myrtle Capital.

Bucko’s back to provide the soundtrack for a musical romp through DoofusLand, but not before sharing some great stories about kicking ass and taking names, literally. We reminisce about happy/gay accidents, severe injuries, and retarded home remedies. Then we descend into a sing-along gone horribly wrong. Apologies to Alice In Chains, John Mayer, Dave Mathews, Warrant, The Scorpions, Boston, Steppenwolf, Poison, Ted Nugent, Survivor, Eddie Vedder, and especially REM. We’re like an E.coli-infested slaughterhouse, but for music.

If you don’t hate us yet, just hang around 45 minutes or so.

Celebrities, of course! But not the trashy, whorish, slutbag douchebottles you hear about on the so-called “real” news. Oh no. Not at all. We have real celebrities (fake) with real stories (fake) that are real funny! (really)

Plus, for the longtime Luke and Posey Friends™ and new listeners alike, the second half of our show will be a real treat. Allow us to lead you down a foreboding path of failure and darkness, resulting in Luke and Posey hitting pod-bottom, and struggling to pull themselves back up from the ditches of despair, and into the hearts of America once again. Just like Bon Jovi.

P.S. Here’s the Sensimilla Street we referenced in the show. Our sources tell us it comes from “Ned & Manson”, who are apparently too stoned to have a decent presence on Google.

I’m talking about brain damage, of course. Severely debilitating brain damage.

And some other stuff. I think.

Till next time, try not to make an ass of yourself. But if you do, call us.

Click the image to play, *OR*
Right-click one of the “Download” links below and click “Save Link/Target As…”. Then open the file when you’re done. If you do not understand these instructions as they have been given, please, call our help line. 903-704-4449.

We love you. We honestly love you. Let us know where we stand, k? We are soooo into you.