Things are really looking good for the show for 2009. I’m thinking daily hour-long shows with accompanying video casts and bonus content for fan club members. Oh yeah, and a fan club. Oh yeah, and fans!

Yeah, buddy, 2009 is gonna be the year for us. You just wait and see.

So join us as we share our porn pasts and breathe heavily into the microphones, won’t you? Oh, you will. I can smell it. Mmmmm. Musky.

Now, everyone… let’s dance!

But much better than that brief yet comical paragraph is the actual show, people! We got the world-famous MC Meat Sweats of Posey’s Pride up in this bitch for an epically awesome hour of entertainment.

Forever Your Love,
Luke and Posey

P.S. Yes, we know her name was Topanga. Just another brick in the fail-wall.

And hey, if you didn’t notice, I posted 5 songs from this very show to the Bits page, so please, have your way with them.

*puppies and rainbows* *oh, and these guys* *oh, and murderers*

Bucko’s back to provide the soundtrack for a musical romp through DoofusLand, but not before sharing some great stories about kicking ass and taking names, literally. We reminisce about happy/gay accidents, severe injuries, and retarded home remedies. Then we descend into a sing-along gone horribly wrong. Apologies to Alice In Chains, John Mayer, Dave Mathews, Warrant, The Scorpions, Boston, Steppenwolf, Poison, Ted Nugent, Survivor, Eddie Vedder, and especially REM. We’re like an E.coli-infested slaughterhouse, but for music.

If you don’t hate us yet, just hang around 45 minutes or so.

Celebrities, of course! But not the trashy, whorish, slutbag douchebottles you hear about on the so-called “real” news. Oh no. Not at all. We have real celebrities (fake) with real stories (fake) that are real funny! (really)

Plus, for the longtime Luke and Posey Friends™ and new listeners alike, the second half of our show will be a real treat. Allow us to lead you down a foreboding path of failure and darkness, resulting in Luke and Posey hitting pod-bottom, and struggling to pull themselves back up from the ditches of despair, and into the hearts of America once again. Just like Bon Jovi.

P.S. Here’s the Sensimilla Street we referenced in the show. Our sources tell us it comes from “Ned & Manson”, who are apparently too stoned to have a decent presence on Google.

I’m talking about brain damage, of course. Severely debilitating brain damage.

And some other stuff. I think.

Till next time, try not to make an ass of yourself. But if you do, call us.

We love you. We honestly love you. Let us know where we stand, k? We are soooo into you.

I’m kidding, the show’s not gay. It’s just confused right now. We all remember 15, right? … right?

Next time, you can be frank. And I can be Shirley.

We’re a-roarin’ back in grand fashion, by introducing longtime friend Chuck into the Luke and Posey Komedy Korral™! Mix in a heart-felt impromptu love song to the cloven-hoofed hotties among us, and hell, that’s what we call a show!

Yippy ka yay, mother fuckers.

Me love you long time.

Join Luke and Posey as they explore some real health issues facing our planet today. Such as soapy manboobs. And a sexy TILF (Torso I’d Like to Fuck, duh…). We also discuss the merits of stunting the growth and natural female development of a mentally disabled 9-year-old girl. And her blog.

Love ya later!

Yeah, those are the lyrics from the theme song. So what.

I didn’t start the show notes really trying to rhyme.
It just happened cuz it’s late and I’m runnin’ out of time.
And it seems people think that you’re smarter than you are,
When you spin a rhythmic verse, rhyming simple words like “are”.

This show’s about the bling, and the thing, then we sing.
Of course we get to learn, then we burn a few things.
Well, the podcast is saving in another window,
So my cpu is tellin’ me I gots to go.

Peas.

But what it is, my brutha, is an amalgamation of sorts. An abundance of dumbassity the likes of which have only been seen on the previous 8 shows. Impressions, songs, insensitive comments, movements, and moments… all comin’ atcha like junebugs on a windshield on a spring day in Texas when it’s actually spring-type weather and not freezing my balls off. What? I don’t know.

Next time.

This week, we learn how to write a song (by singing a song, of course), and we learn that Posey hates country music, but doesn’t mind anal rape. We also find out that Bucko fucking hates Posey, although it’s probably because he’s jealous of his mad freestyle rap skillzez. Oh, and make sure you listen all the way to the end for a HUGE GIVEAWAY ANNOUNCEMENT! Don’t miss your chance to blow this opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo.

And if you don’t know, this episode presents the conclusion of the Special Concert Series with Bucko. Once again, we’d like to thank Bucko for making the show even better, and for not insisting on any sort of pesky contract or financial compensation. Thanks guy.

Catch you next… week?

You may ask yourself, “Self, how do you know when it’s time for a new episode of The Luke And Posey Show?” Well, self, during this month of April 2007, you can expect a brand steamin’ new episode every Monday morning. That’s right, you didn’t go all retarded just then… you actually read that. Weekly, bitches. Boom. Score one for buttbeard.

In case you’re wondering, this show continues our Special Concert Series With Bucko. Posey recounts his encounter with a dragon, American Idol gets ass-raped in 4/4 time, we learn of Posey’s special bond with his uncle (hint: it’s a concrete bond), and last but most definitely not least, we are grandly introduced to the newest members of the Luke and Posey show cast… I could say more, but I have to stop. I have got to stop it. Oh good lord I need to stop.

Later lates.

That’s right lovers, HUGE things are going down at the Luke and Posey Studios. We got special guests, musical magic, and much love for a special lady we like to call, “a strippa”.

You know the rest.

I don’t want to say too much about this super awesome extra special show, except the fact that it may end our podcasting careers forever. Really. I’m serious. Yep. Not Kidding. Nope. I’m lying. We’ll never stop. You can’t stop us. Don’t even try. You will not succeed. I’d rather be. I’d rather be with. I’d rather be with an animal. Rowr!

Hey, vote for us and shit. I’m not gonna suck your dick anymore.

Well I’ll tell you what better way, since I ASKED! With a new, pretty, sparkly show constructed of entirely random bullshit. Seriously. We sat down to check some levels ( on the, did I mention, new equipment? ) and shat out this stinky pile of sheer ridiculosity. Luckily, some of it was pretty damn funny, so that’s what you get to hear. Lucky you! I said LUCKY YOU!

Sorry, listener. I got carried away there. I’d really like to make up for it. Say, is there some site somewhere where I could possibly vote for you as top podcast listener? There’s not? Hmm, you know there really should be. But since we’re on the subject, did you know there is a site where you can vote for us as a top podcast! What, no way!

And if you’re not already, subscribe to us on iTunes, would ya? We could always use some good myspace friends too, so add away, people! One last thing, call our feedback line at 903-704-4449 and become an instant media sensation! Guaranteed! Or your money back! Thank you and goodnight!

Holy shit, you still reading? Ok, well, the new episode is about what you’d expect from a couple of buffoons like Luke and Posey. While maybe not as blatantly offensive as the first show, it’s every bit as disgusting, moronic, and wonderfully hilarious. And hey, if you like what you hear, why not let us know? Email us at theshow@lukeandposey.com, or become our most favoritest fan ever by leaving us a voice mail at 903-704-4449. We’ll play it on the next show. Hell, I’ll make it my ringtone. And while you’re feeling the love for your favorite Luke and/or Posey, why not vote for us over at Podcast Alley? Posey will give you a pube if you do. Promise. Ball pubes only by special request.

Edit: Episode 1 has been archived.